Being Jordan by Katie Price

Author:Katie Price
Language: eng
Format: epub, mobi
ISBN: 9781843582434
Publisher: John Blake Publishing
Published: 2011-04-29T16:00:00+00:00

CHAPTER SEVENTEEN

FALLING APART

I opened the door to our flat and collapsed sobbing to the floor. I couldn’t – wouldn’t – believe that our relationship was over. As I lay there I thought, If I can’t be with Dane, I don’t know if I can go on. I picked myself up and staggered to the bathroom. I opened the cabinet and grabbed a bottle of pills. I wanted oblivion, and it wanted it now. I started shoving pills into my mouth, washing them down with water. It was making me retch, but I kept forcing them down. If I take all these, I thought, then he’ll realise how much I love him and how much I want to be with him, and he’ll come back to me.

I don’t know how many pills I had taken, but suddenly my heart started racing wildly. I felt faint, dizzy, out of control. I was frightened. I crawled to the bedroom where I managed to pick up the phone and call Sally. She was horrified when I told her what I’d done. I wasn’t making any sense and was crying hysterically. I curled up on the bed clutching a photograph of Dane and me. The room was spinning and I was slipping in and out of consciousness. I could still hear Sally on the phone asking me if I was all right. I tried to speak, but I couldn’t. I blacked out.

The next thing I knew, the doorbell was ringing and ringing. I tried to drag myself off the bed, but my body wouldn’t obey me. The bell kept on ringing. Somehow I crawled to the door and opened it. Two paramedics were standing there. Immediately they started examining me and questioning me about what I’d taken, but by now I couldn’t speak. I was still holding on to the picture. They tried to ease it out of my fingers, but I wouldn’t let go of it.

Then Sally arrived looking frantic with worry, closely followed by Dane who showed no emotion. He didn’t even come up and comfort me. If I thought I could change his mind, I was wrong. I was rushed to hospital in an ambulance, which I later discovered Dane had called, but if he still felt anything for me he wasn’t showing it.

At the hospital, they hooked me up to a heart monitor, gave me some kind of injection and made me drink charcoal to neutralise the drugs. Sally was sitting by the bed, holding my hand and trying to soothe me. Dane was standing in the corner.

‘I’m sorry,’ I pleaded with him. ‘I love you.’ I said it over and over again. But he said nothing. Eventually I saw Sally mouthing at him, ‘Hold her hand’, and he came over and did that. But even in my out-of-it state, I could tell that he didn’t want to be there. Eventually my mum turned up. I was so glad to see her. I just wanted her to tell me everything was going to be all right, even though I knew it couldn’t be.

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